[Game] Corrupt A Wish

Okay, so lets play a game, "Corrupt A Wish"
For those who don't know how it works, read below:
First, someone makes a wish. Then someone else grants it with an ironic twist -- the wish goes completely wrong -- and also makes a wish. Then a third person grants/corrupts that wish and makes a wish and so on...
Example:
Person 1: I wish to have a pet dinosaur.
Person 2: Granted, but the dinosaur is made up of sugar which then gave you diabetes.
I wish for a sandwich.
Person 3: Granted, but the sandwich is made up of pact sand.
I wish for a pony.
And so on...
ONE RULE: You can't wish for an incorruptible wish.
Be original and have fun! (:
Now, lets begin.

I wish to rule the world.

Granted but you rule a world of monkeys, and you get rabies and day the next day.

I wish for the server to be 24/7.

Granted but the hosts' computer got infected with conficker which then spread through the whole world.
I wish to conquer the universe.

Granted, but in 2020, the universe would be destroyed by evil big headed aliens.
I wish I could get the server to work. ):

Granted but you played so much you got so fat that you died the next day
I wish that more people would play Blue Ms

Granted, but the over population of players crash the server into non-existence. :p
I wish to take over planet Earth.

Granted, but people from Mars went to war with Earth and lost.
I wish I have something to wish for.

Granted, You wish to die.
I wish that Prince shot herself, and lived...in a hospital bed with severe pains for 2 weeks before dieing. lolz don't take it to badly..

Granted, but Prince comes back to shoot you with a BB gun.
I wish I had a better computer.

Granted, but this computer explodes from its speed.
I wish the server was up.

Granted, but the moment the server was up, Roge goes offline.
I wish I wasn't so bored.

Granted but instead of being bored you kill yourself..

I wish for another wish

Granted, you wished for chocolate instead. Then you got obese and died of a heart attack.
I wish for a graphic calculator.

Granted, but a cookie monster ate it
I wish I could have 20 wishes

Granted but your first wish was to kill yourself, painfully and slowly
I wish that no one else could wish but me

Granted, ............................................................... sike!
I wish a billion dollars that cannot be damaged or stolen from me

Granted, but it was counterfeit and you were arrested

I WISH I HAD A DONUT

Granted you ate the donut then died from food poisoning
I wish for the next person to say blah blah blah in their next post.

granted but blah blah blah u died omg so hard
i wish for a tissue

Granted, but it was filled with sperm and you used it to wipe your butt.
Welcome to the world of AIDs! xD
I wish to be the invulnerable ruler of planet Earth.

Granted, the earth exploded and you spent eternity wondering through space
I wish to be the king or earth and that you can't corrupt my wishes

Granted, but then you undo your wish and now everyone is assaulting you with all kinds of crap
I wish I was at home with a better computer playing the server right now.

Granted, but the computer got an AI and killed you.

I wish ........... for NOTHING!

granted but u get nuthing
i wished for a playboy magazine

Granted but it was Playboy- Ugliest people in the World! edition

I wish for SOMETHING.